Saturday, December 13, 2008

Adoption Info

I realized today that I had stepped away from talking about the seminar and never went back to it for various reasons. We came out of the seminar learning what we needed to know, we are not able to adopt right now through an agency such as the one that we went to. They have one really unique international program that intrigues me but even that program is out of our budget. We don't qualify for one of their programs based on my weight and our joint medical histories. One of the programs I was interested in, turns out that we only qualify for special needs kids due to their requirements that nonspecial needs children are placed with only families of the same "nationality" as the country. I have to lose about 10lbs to qualify for their China program but they aren't really encouraging about that program due to the long wait times that hasn't cleared up since the Olympics like originally thought. I'm guessing it might have to do with Hague also.

Their domestic infant program wasn't any less expensive than the international programs and for some reason that really surprised me. Though if we end up going with an agency not in our state for some reason, I would definitely consider this agency for our homestudy. I liked the social worker and the agency's "not going to sugarcoat information" policy. Their domestic infant program would be an interesting choice simply based on where their birth mothers primarily reside, but we have pretty much decided that unless a newborn comes to us by way of someone we know, some other way of "falling in to our lap" so to speak, or out of a miracle pregnancy, we would rather skip that stage. Sounds selfish I know but if we have to pay for the privilege to be parents...shouldn't we get a choice in the matter? There are others out there that only want a newborn and won't settle for anything less. So isn't it the same? I doubt we will be pursuing any domestic infant programs.

We were going to go to another agency meeting at the beginning of December but with work and my apprehension about hearing fees that we just can't pay right now, I didn't preregister. It is for an agency that I know has been around for a long time. We might go in January but most likely February. This agency also deals with foster adopt but they don't seem to have a seminar on it. I need to do some more research after the beginning of the year on the process for our county.

I wish there was a way to pull 30K out of a hat but there just isn't for us right now.


bethkyle said...

Doesn't it burn you when people respond to discussions of infertility with 'Have you thought of adoption?'

I think adoption is a wonderful thing, and I would LOVE to bring a child into our home that needs a home, but there is no way we could come up with 30K for it.

I just think the people who say that really don't understand what it really takes...

OK sorry to go off on a tangent. I am glad they were straight-forward and gave you sound information.

I am pulling for you....

princessoftides said...

Hi Deb, thanks for your good wishes!

Hope you guys find an agency that's more reasonable. It makes me crazy that between the cost and the restrictions, so many good parents and good kids are not being matched.

Good luck -