Monday, March 30, 2009

Monday Sickness?

I am seriously starting to wonder if I have Monday sickness. Two weeks ago, I was over the top ill from increasing my Metformin. Last week... the stomach flu hit with avengence. This week, I feel like utter crap. My stomach hurts, I'm nauseous again, and add in a lovely headache.

Monday sickness... it needs to go away.

Sunday, March 29, 2009

Blah--An annoying kind of day......TMI maybe.

Last week was an attack of the stomach flu. Seems to be better now but my stomach does still hurt occasionally. Not so bad today but had to resort to ginger ale to settle it down some. I have been trying to skip pop so that was more annoying that I couldn't make it a pop free day over how bad it was... I know, silly a bit.

Today is Cycle day 12 so spot is here! Yay! Hopefully it will be gone soon. So annoying that the cause and a solution can't be found. Who knows, maybe the stomachache is actually due to a cyst and now it is draining...

My father's family has found me on Facebook. It will be interesting to see how this goes. So far only two members have requested access to my profile. We shall see. I have a cousin in Peoria, IL that I have never met. I knew about her but things were always wierd because her father had remarried when she was young and had more children. For some reason though, she has been less estranged with the Aunts and Uncles than I have, there is still a lot of guilt there about my father I think. If I find out my Grandma died through Facebook..... ugh, I can't even go there.

I have chicken broth and chicken and dumplings cooking. It smells nice in here and I hope it turns out yummy.

Lots of work to do and well, I keep finding distractions to keep me from it. I don't want to deal with any of it but such is life.

May Monday be a good, productive, and snow free day for everyone.

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

If you are so inclined...

Please register and vote for this project and/or one of the others if you are so inclined. It is a really great idea and her self portraits/pictures were really beautiful.

Yes, it stinks that you need to register but if you are compelled please do so...

Thanks!

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Book Challenge

my challenge reading list looks like this:

1. Aloha: Four inspiring novellas
2. Twilight by Stephenie Meyer
3. New Moon by Stephenie Meyer
4. Love Afloat: Four inspiring novellas
5. Eclipse by Stephenie Meyer
6. Breaking Dawn by Stephenie Meyer
7. Gossip Girl by Cecily von Ziegesar
8. Inside Out Girl by Tish Cohen
9. Amy and Isabelle by Elizabeth Strout
10. To Live Until We Say Goodbye by Elisabeth Kubler Ross

This is for Dragondreamer's Lair Book Challenge

Friday, March 20, 2009

Ugh...

I went to the endo today. She is fine with leaving the metformin at 1500mg...whew! However, she is leaving at the end of June so back to the drawing board with a new dr. They don't know who is replacing her yet so who knows if they will be covered by our insurance. The other endo in this clinic isn't covered for some reason. Most of their drs are covered but a few here and there are not so I didn't make a follow up appointment. I need to make a note to call for a refill of the metformin in May so that I can wait as long as possible to see the new dr, though I have to have lab work in July so that may not work.

I really liked her too. Such a pain...

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

CD 43

And.....

AF showed. Oh well, at least I don't have to have the awkward conversation with my endo on Friday.

2000 mg of Metformin is making me ill. Skipped yesterday all together because switching back down to 1500mg on Monday still made me ill, although not as dizzy and much shorter duration of V & N, but ill nonetheless. Took it this morning and will keep going on.

Happy Hump Day!

Sunday, March 15, 2009

......................................

Are we ever truely hopeless? Does hope ever die?

There have been many moments in my life that I have felt that way. I have been going along thinking what is the point. There is no hope.

Yet, with every new cycle, with every late period, with every little twinge in this huge o'l belly of mine... I grab onto this string that gets smaller with every passing day. Grabbing that string does nothing for me in the end but for some reason I can't stop reaching for that tiny piece of string.

This is where I sit... holding on to this tiny frayed string, logically knowing that everything that my body is doing is related to this medicine, but yet I can't let go. I can't let go of the idea that maybe all it took was one dr who totally believed that this medicine would make my body work the way it should. Logically I know that I haven't been on the med long enough to work things out. Yet, I can't let go. We have been trying since September of 2003 and yet all I want right now is for this tiny frayed bit of hope to turn into a wonderful little living, breathing, long awaited for 35th birthday present.

This, this is why I want AF to show before the dr appointment on Friday. I don't want her to further this little frayed string of hope needlessly. It is painful enough without the dr's help.

Friday, March 13, 2009

Metformin ER Update, maybe TMI

So, I was awfully nervous about taking metformin again. With good reason, the previous times that I have been on it, I had been ill all the time. I was only eating once a day and still having to visit the restroom in urgency all day long.

This time around, I have changed things up a bit. I have been avoiding the raw veggies during the ramp up portion of the dosing. I did finally have salad yesterday and no issues but I have been on the current dose of 1500mg for about 3 weeks now. I can't seem to get up to 4 pills per day. Every time I try I end up with horrible nausea and dry heaves in the morning. I go back to the endo next week and I know she will have something to say because my weight is up on the meds...not down. Part of that is that I have been on the Met long enough to have my cycle screwed up on it. I don't understand this and my other Dr could never explain why my typically 31-33 day cycles go to 44-48 and sometimes skip completely while I am taking the Metformin. Most women have the opposite reaction......their long cycles become shorter. The problem with the longer cycles is that my body still starts gaining "water weight" just as it would for a 31 day cycle and yet, she still isn't here yet.

So I am a bit down about that... my weight is within 7lbs of my highest. Yesterday... it was within 4lbs but I drank a bunch of tea and had asparagus to hopefully get rid of some of the sodium bloat and AF water. We will see what happens. I think I am going to try taking 2 in the am, 1 at lunch, and then 1 at dinner to see if that has any impact on the dry heaves and nausea. I have to work in the morning tomorrow but I gave myself a bigger window so that if there were issues I would have time to settle them down.

Things I have been doing differently this time that seem to be helping...

1. Eating a banana with my morning pills
2. Actually eating 3 meals per day even if I am worried about issues. When I skip breakfast and take my pills late I usually am in the bathroom for the rest of the day after lunch.
3. Taking my evening pills at dinner time instead of bedtime with a snack
4. Reducing my refined carb intake
5. Sticking to the no raw veggie rule for at least two weeks after a dose change.

so that's it.... I have to make an appt to see my GP about BP meds and then I see the endo in a week. Yay! :( Is it bad to say that I really hope AF shows before my appt with her so I don't have to hear her say I might be pregnant?

Sunday, March 08, 2009

Project Runway...

So apparently, there was a season of Project Runway that was shot for the most recent fashion week but due to conflict between Bravo, Lifetime, and the show's producers who apparently pulled the show from Bravo without rights... it still is in the closet.

Here is the quote from the Wiki.....

"The as-yet unaired sixth season was the first season of Project Runway to be filmed in Los Angeles rather than New York. The season was filmed at the Fashion Institute of Design and Merchandising,[6] and pre-finale filming concluded on Friday, October 17, 2008.[7]

The sixth season had been announced to begin airing in January 2009 on Lifetime, but this did not occur. The announcement occurred before NBC Universal sought preliminary injunctive action effectively enjoining production. The launch may be further delayed due to Lifetime's request that the suit between NBC Universal and The Weinstein Co. be removed to federal court.[8][9][10] As of January 30, 2009, the court case is still in state court, with no trial date set.[11]

The three finalists of the sixth season showed their collections at New York Fashion Week at Bryant Park on February 20, 2009, but the finalist designers were not named and did not appear onstage. Their identities were kept secret to protect the suspense when and if the season airs on television.[12]"

Bah, and instead we will probably get another town of Real Housewives... yeah, because Atlanta was so great Pffft.

Wednesday, March 04, 2009

Fabio--Top Chef 5

.... Earlier in the day when the Reunion aired for the first time........

LOL! Fabio was just on The Bonnie Hunt Show which I rarely watch because she can be annoying to me but today with Charlie Gibson and Fabio I was LMAO.

Even the idea of Chocolate polenta didn't turn me off. Fabio was doing his typical, "I am Italian, I don't know much English" schtick and I had to laugh about his google comment.

....... After the reunion........

Anyhow... I am glad that he won fan favorite. Interesting that Leah and Hosea would be dating but only if he moves to New York. Seems like maybe they don't really want each other that much.


Casting has started for the next season!

Top Chef Finale--If you still haven't watched it...spoiler alert.

Yes, I waited a whole week to watch it. Things were a bit crazy and then I just didn't feel like it. I was able to avoid learning who one so that was good thing.

All I have to say is "Yay, no stephan" and "effing Casey", she choked in her own finale and then she just convinced Carla that things she had never done would work out well. Carla... you are smarter than that and you probably would have one if you hadn't of listened to chokey casey.

Now for the reunion. I did notice that Leah kissed Hosea on the lips but he pulled away during the congratulations at the end of the show.

Bah... now what do I watch ;)

Anyone have any idea when Project Runway 6 will be coming to Lifetime? I don't watch Lifetime all that much and I don't know if Bravo will be advertising it since I don't even have a clue if Lifetime is another NBC station or not.

Tuesday, March 03, 2009

Ramblings of a tired woman

Still here...

My mom had surgery last week so I was running between her house and mine for the past several days. Next weeks she starts back to work and has PT so I will be helping out with the driving until she can drive herself. My dad can drive her to PT this week since it is just that but my mom doesn't want to overtire him so one trip out is better than two since she works about a half hour from their house and she is going to PT near her office. Since her surgery went well and the issue wasn't quite what they thought, she has been having an easier recovery than anticipated. This is great and she will be returning to work about 2 weeks ahead of schedule. She will probably be back to work full time almost by the time she was just going to start back part time so her boss is very happy since no one knows how to do her job completely. While this is good in some respects, it also causes her a lot of stress. Just like my husband... no one else can do all that he does at his office so he has a really hard time letting go and taking time off.

I was dreaming of a warm weather getaway but we won't be able to pull it off. We were going to head to spring training but then my mom's surgery popped up. So then we were going to go to opening week in Houston. But, that appears to be out also. The bathroom, well, it has become the money suck of the moment. It needs to get redone and the more I look at things, the more I realize it is going to cost a bunch more than even I thought about. I wish we didn't have to spend the money but there really is no choice.

but... tonight, tonight I am wishing that our numbers hit on the mega millions. We are in a pool with a group of people but even if it means that we can't quit work completely, I wouldn't mind having the house paid off or even just the student loans. Or... well, I won't let my mind go there right now. I am trying to accept reality and it appears that childless is our reality.