Still no answers...

GI doctor had no additional information. He thinks that if the stomach issues return and can't be controlled by the med he gave me that I need to have a colonscopy but he is willing to wait to see if the Nuvaring resolves the pain. My BP is running higher than it had been previously but isn't scary high... then again, it has only been 2 days. Hopefully it is just my stressing about it that is the cause of the increased numbers and not the actual med.

Pain is still there so no miracle cure but maybe it will disappear this month. Still not sure how to handle that but I was watching an older episode of THE TALK the other day. I had purposely been avoiding it for reasons unknown to me except that a friend informed me that it was about Jillian Micheal's adoption and PCOS. I guess that people have been annoyed with her about some comments in regards to pregnancy. She said something to a reporter about "not wanting to do that to her body" and since she was unprepared for that question in the interview she didn't address it the way that she wanted to. She actually has PCOS and Endometriosis. Her body is healthy right now and she had made the decision that taking the hormones she would need to get pregnant weren't worth wrecking the health she has built when she could adopt to achieve her goals. I guess this struck a cord with me because again I have been arguing with myself that going through treatments would be selfish and possibly harmful, especially if I can't even handle the hormones from various contraceptives. If these hormones are the same that would be injected, ingested, increased during the cycles and also any subsequent pregnancy, then it follows reasonable logic that the pregnancy would be detrimental and have consequences such as pre-eclampsia that could/would be potentially harmful to me, DH, family members, and worse of all our possible child.

Honestly, right now we can't do anything due to financial constraints. But I am in a complete Catch 22 when it comes to trying to help out the household. I want to get a part time job or a different full time job but with this pain, it doesn't seem like a good idea to job search until this is resolved. At the same time, the part time job sounds fine but a different full time job would mess with my schedule. I started on this current career path to make it easier for us when we would have children and yet 8 years later we are no closer to that point. So do I change careers again and not worry about the hours? Do I just hope that business will pick up and that I can find my niche in the future? Do I just go back to retail and keep my current professional license active so I can go back full time when things work out the way we wish for? Or do I go back to school and start a new path that would throw a wrench in the whole thing? Limbo I tell you... Limbo!

Lemon Thyme Pork Medallions

I found this recipe in the WW Cook It Quick cookbook. It really is a quick recipe and both of us felt is a keeper for our house. It was nice to finally hit a recipe that we both liked as the last few have sort of flopped around here.

Limbo forever?

Sometimes I feel like my life will be in limbo forever. I realize that isn't possible. Everyday things change. I just feel stuck....

Of course what the doctor said on Friday didn't really help much. She believes it is just a typical monthly follicle that formed a cyst and that this is happening every month or two. She claims that since it didn't change either it is a new one or it just hasn't been given enough time to disappear yet. Three options. Use some form of hormonal birth control to see if that stops the pain/stops the formation of cysts, get another ultrasound in 6-8 weeks to see if the cyst disappears or if there is another, undergo an laparoscopy to see what is going on. I opted for a month or two of the nuvaring to see if I can tolerate it/if the pain suddenly disappears. No guarantee it won't piss off my blood pressure so need to keep an eye on that and just DWI. If the nuvaring doesn't work/can't be used then I'm going to ask for another ultrasound. If there is still a cyst there then it is time for surgery. I'm not sure how I will handle it if it works. Does that mean that I am actually ovulating occassionally? Or is it one of these things where the follicle is forming but not releasing the egg? I don't know.

But, I am strangely holding out hope that the GI doctor has a definite cause on Tuesday.

Grrrrrrr. I had really hoped to be out of pain by my birthday.

2011 Goals

Just realized I never posted my yearly goals over here.

1. Take a family free trip with DH (We haven’t had a vacation that didn’t involve family somehow since our Honeymoon with the exception of a quick weekend for our 5th anniversary)

2. Clean out the 3rd bedroom and get it set up as a guest bedroom or additional office

3. Check off 4 items on my DH’s “I’ve never been to:” list and maybe 1 of them will be a new item for me as well.

4. Keep up with my inperson weightloss support group as long as it is a good tool for me.

5. Cook dinner an average of 5 times per week, even if it means using a stashed item from the freezer.

6. Try 1 new recipe a week

7. Be in a full exercise routine by the end of the year that amounts to a minimum of 150 minutes a week but averaging closer to 240 minutes per week.

8. Keep up with the 15 min decluttering/15 min reading per day throughout the year.

May 2011 be a successful year for everyone!

Maybe I'm not crazy...

or maybe I still am. Tired of being a whiner, I stopped talking about what was going with me because I just thought it was going to be a part of everyday life with no known cause. It has started to seem that way after intermittent abdominal pain over the past 8 months. Appendicitis has been ruled out. My ob/gyn wasn't convinced that it was the ovarian cysts that were seen on both CT scans. My GI doctor thought she was probably right. Hopefully in the next week or so we will have a definite answer or at least a course of treatment.

The followup ultrasound showed that the cyst has not disappeared. Ob/Gyn says I need to come in to discuss options but of course I can't get in for another week. GI sent a letter that the blood work all came back normal so I don't have celiac disease and there isn't any inflammation showing so it most likely is not Chron's or Colitis. Yesterday I had another test that looks at the intestines more closely so hopefully this will show if there is a bowel issue.

I'm still processing and I hope that the Ob/Gyn has a quick answer.

Book Challenge Final Update!

I didn't make my goal this year. It was sort of a surprise but not really. I did finally get through most of the Harry Potter series and I might just finish it today. Too bad I didn't take the time that I should have to read this year.

My reading list is here

May everyone has a wonderful 2011!